Dad moments

“And, “I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty.” 2 Corinthians 6:18 NIV

When I was a kid, the main course of our family was set by our parents. My dad was quiet, maybe one of the least talkative people I knew as a kid. I remember him singing at church and it was literally terrible. He was known as a strict disciplinarian and held the line well. I don’t want to use the word fear because it wounds worse than I mean. But we knew he meant what he said. As much of a reputation as my dad had, one of my favorite stories about him involved my youngest sister. She could be a challenge (hi sis).

On numerous occasions our mom would send us to our rooms to “wait until dad got home.” The wait was awful. But after he came in, she would give the details and tell him to go ring our bell or whatever term she used. On this occasion he went in her room and asked her what happened. We all thought she got swats (yes, we got those). But we found out later that he swatted the pillow and told her to act like it hurt. What the heck?

As it turns out my dad saw the need of the little girl he called daughter. I sometimes forget how much that word must have meant to him. He could have given her a swat or two. Instead, maybe he saw that my mom may have lost her sanity for a bit that day. He may have thought my sister deserved it, but he chose a different path. It worked. That moment has stuck with her to this day. We all have memories like that with him.

My daughter tells me that I was the most strict dad of any of her friends. I was fine with that, but I think at times I was too strict on some things. I took one of her “boyfriends” to the cemetery one time. His behavior made the meeting necessary. He needed a little more fear in his life and he got it that day. She told me “Word got around, people think that was crazy”. Young man if you are out there, I bet you would do the same thing for your daughter.

My hope is that I took advantage of some of those opportunities to connect with her as well. I have had a lot of titles in my life. Of those, “Dad” ranks at the top. I hope my kids know how much the words “daughter” and “son” mean to me.

My role has changed quite a bit. Jordyn beat me to heaven but I will see her again. Korbin is 18 and doing things we were told he would literally never do. Aly has her own daughter now and it is so beautiful to watch her in that role. Right by her side I am getting to watch her husband get used to the role of being a father. You ought to see it. This big, strong, capable man melts like butter around my granddaughter. I could see him faking swats because my daughter temporarily lost her mind.

Young dads, how much time do you spend trying to make memories instead of doing things on your to do list? You’ll get your list done, but can miss the truly important if you are not careful.

Old dads, don’t think of your role as less. It’s just a different view of beautiful.

Challenge: Put “Making memories” on your to do list. Maybe it is a challenge, but it is the best thing on earth. Have a Happy Father’s day.

Rick Claiborn