Don Scantlin

“Whoever acknowledges me before others, I will also acknowledge before my father in heaven.”  Matthew 10:32 NIV

     Sitting in the greenhouse is something I probably mention more often than necessary, but I am sitting in the best environment I can imagine trying to get words from my heart to the screen.  I met a new friend yesterday.  Unfortunately, it was after his passing.  I sat in a room yesterday with members of his family who just wanted to be able to let people know who this man is to them.

     I have been in similar shoes when we had to plan a funeral for Jordyn.  We are over 15 years from that day for us.  They will remember the task for a long time.  Carolyn, one of his granddaughters is one of Jordyn’s best friends.  Beyond that I really did not know anything, until yesterday. 

     He met his wife while she was a dispatcher for the police department.  He was a police officer.  The most consistent detail from this meeting was the look on her face as she described their story. Well earned love stories have a way of being bigger than life, because they are.  So when I asked her what she first noticed about him I was expecting loving words.  She simply said “I didn’t like him.  He was too obnoxious.”  He either mellowed or she grew fond of him in spite of it.  My bet is on the latter.  Those eyes love her husband. 

     She described him as “a man looking for his place in life”.  I think he found it.  He already had two kids when they met.  She had three.  Together they now have 15 grandchildren and 5 great grandchildren.  Everyone in the room had stories about him and none of them remembered anything about a “his and her” type family situation.  Everyone was all in. 

     I love the fact that he purposefully took all of his grandchildren fishing for their first time.  He also taught all of the Kansas grandchildren how to tie their shoes.  He also taught them all to drive.  I’ve seen Carolyn drive.  Maybe he was better at teaching them to fish than to drive, or maybe one student did not remember all of the lessons. 

     He also called his kids every Sunday, ever.  This one probably resonated with me as much as anything.  I have taken Aly on a date nearly every Sunday for probably 20 years.  Harlee and Oliver get to go now, which is even better. 

     No one accidentally teaches all of their grandchildren anything.  No one accidentally calls each of their kids every week for three decades.  Purposeful decisions confirmed over and over for decades is all it takes. 

I wonder if my family thinks I am as committed to them as his family clearly think he was to his? 

Do you wonder what you will be known for when you are gone?  What are you currently known for?  If there is a gap between the two, maybe you have time to work on that. 

Challenge:  What I heard and saw more than anything in all of them was love.  They knew he loved them, his life kept reminding them so they wouldn’t forget.  Let people know how much you love them. 

Rick Claiborn