Friends

Jonathan said to David, “Whatever you want me to do, I’ll do for you”. 1 Samuel 20:4

I have been blessed with friends. At times I have wondered how, but I am thankful. We have seen friends come along side of us at our worst times and we have celebrated with friends as well. Our life is better because of our friendships.

For Jordyn, friends seemed to come easy. After she died, we noticed that we saw kids from every group. She knew people from such a broad spectrum it was remarkable. If she was ever in a room full of people, she made a point to talk to every person. It was easy for her.

Aly has a lot of friends but it seemed to be a little more work when she was younger. If she was in a room full of people she did not talk to very many of them if she had to speak first. As she has grown older she makes friends easily, but her personality is just more reserved.

Contrary to our daughters, if Korbin is in a room full of strangers he just leaves. It is much harder to get to know him. It is hard to connect with him even for us sometimes. Its nearly impossible for someone who is not around him consistently. No one connects with him by accident. It takes work and time.

One day at an IEP meeting we heard a story. One of the kids in the class had a birthday. He asked for cake. Korbin does not eat cake and in fact does not eat much at school at all. At this particular party he walked up and got a slice. The teachers watched him because that seemed odd. He took it to another kid in the class. Hollis enjoyed the cake and Korbin just sat next to him. New friends.

We ended up contacting Hollis’ mom. We set up a meeting at Sternburg Museum. I met his mom and we just watched as the two sort of bonded right in front of our eyes. They had fun and one of us said something like they could come over any day. Hollis just looked up and said “How about tomorrow?” Hollis now comes over to the house regularly. He has explored every square inch of our house, using a flashlight actually.

They have found ways to communicate. They laugh. They play video games. They jump on the trampoline or at least Hollis does while Korbin watches. Hollis is a lot like Korbin except he is verbal, and man he uses a lot of words. He has a WWE persona that he acts out, complete with intro music. We found him a tackling dummy to help in this area. He is a walking piece of joy.

Hollis had his birthday come around. He asked for cupcakes for everyone – except Korbin. He knew Korbin did not like them so he asked for Skittles for him. As it turns out he did not want Korbin to be the only one not eating cupcakes so he skipped them and ate Skittles with Korbin. He decided not to partake in the joy of one of his favorite foods because he did not want to leave his friend out.

Korbin obviously knew it was his birthday. I need to mention that Korbin does not deal well with people singing around him. It bothers him - that’s the best way to describe it. However, knowing it was his friends birthday must have weighed on him. He walked up to Hollis and proceeded to stick his fingers deep into his own ears and sing “Happy Birthday” to his friend. Two unlikely young men found a way to demonstrate authentic friendship.

I am thankful for Hollis. I am thankful for my friends. Some of my friends I am humbled by thinking that I could have in some way ever helped them. Then I realize that probably most of the time I am the project. I realize that God has placed me in the life of someone so I could learn or grow or just laugh. Most of the time. I have been the one who has needed something.

What has someone done to show authentic friendship to you?

What have you done to show authentic friendship to someone else?

Challenge: Tell your friends you love them. Show your friends you love them. If you can’t think of any friends, ask God who you should go introduce yourself to. You never know who will be blessed.

Rick Claiborn