Is water free here?

“And without faith it is impossible to please God.” Hebrews 11:6 NIV

One of my favorite stories about our kids is about Jordy. One of her best friends was working at the Arby's drive through. Over the speaker the familiar voice belonged to my daughter “Is water free here?” She loved to just drive around, but she apparently got thirsty. She was profoundly unable to keep money. You would not believe how fast she could consume the monthly balance we deposited in her high school cafeteria account.

After Jordyn died, we had to go through her car. First, picture the entire contents of a 16-year-old high school girls closet dumped into a mid-sized car named Sasha. We also found dollar bills tucked into odd places. She would randomly find them like buried treasure.

I got a reminder of that story today. I was in a Quicktrip. I heard a gentleman ask, “How much is water here?” The answer was 25 cents. Defeated, he walked out. I watched as he left at a pretty quick pace. I grabbed a bottle of water with my coffee and paid while trying to watch for the red coat he wore. I caught up to him about two blocks later and simply opened the window and held out the bottle. It was sort of like a distance race when you see runners go by a stranger holding water. He took it and never broke stride. He never said a word as he kept walking.

I smile at the memory. It put me in a Jordy kind of mood for the rest of the day – that is not a bad thing. Sometimes you have to get yourself out of that mood. Sometimes you let it wash over you. I am in a stretch of wrestling with this question: How am I supposed to answer when people wonder whether God causes or allows bad things to happen?

We are over 11 years into the journey to see her again and the only answer I can muster is, I don’t really know. Even more, I don’t think it matters. I have grown more comfortable with the fact that for me to know the answer, or for me to believe that my opinion is right, means that I would have to understand God as an equal. Assuming that is foolishly arrogant, although there are times I have assumed.

The night she died I remember a plea I made to Him. He could make her get off the table. He could make her walk out whole. He could and I knew it. I still know it. But I also remember a strong feeling of “No.” Did He cause it? No idea. Did He allow it? Obviously. Whether He had an agenda or an outcome, my response has to be the same, faith without understanding. Faith with understanding would just be knowing.

I have friends who struggle financially. I have friends struggling with cancer. I have friends struggling with their marriage. I have friends who have lost jobs. My brother lost sight in one eye this week (surgery to repair it is in the morning). The prayer list I have running in my head is getting longer. I see strangers who can’t get a drink of water. Every person on my list and every person on your list has the same opportunity, faith.

What is the most consistent question in your faith walk?

How has the answer changed over time?

Challenge: Take the question to Him even if you do not understand the answer. Stick it out. Your faith is pleasing to God. Don’t complicate the journey so much that we miss the guy who just wants a drink of water.

Rick L. Claiborn